Wednesday, February 29, 2012

辩论是……


反方领队行使中休权,双方共享讨论时间一分钟。
我的中学辩论生涯就在最后一次行使中休权后结束了
没错,我输了,自大的我这次真的输了
不仅输了比赛,也输了自己原订下的目标
不能找借口,的确……我必须负上责任……

难道一开始接触学校的时候就错了吗?
几经波折后,我最后还是以领队身份参与这届辩论赛
而也开始了无数次领队身份过后的最后演出
也教导了我好多好多我从不知道的事情

不能说不伤心吧
毕竟大家都下了苦工
输的原因我当然能接受
但是遗憾免不了

这支队伍要打比赛还言之过早
有人这样和我说过
但是我就是那么倔强
决定要参与他们准备
有时候坚持不会是件好事吧
而慢慢地衍生成了固执

我眷恋着这个舞台
我眷恋着那种荣耀
但是这已经成为了绝响
我突然好后悔
为什么当时我选择成为领队
而没不顾一切地当个辩手

对不起,钟豪杰
我实现不了对你的承诺
全场最佳辩手?
柔佛的奖台?
又或者是全中辩?
这些好像都与我无关了

这是我的遗憾
却也不能强加在别人身上
别人询及为什么落败时
我只能和他们说
队伍还年轻,还有机会
却忘了告诉自己
钟豪杰,你没机会了

宣布落败后其实没有多大反应
好像知道这些都是预料中的事情
但是看到他们的神情
我真的差那么定点就泪洒了
我不知道他们想的是什么
但是他们走下来看着我的那刻
其实想抱着他们哭的人……是我

我一直都把你们当作弟弟妹妹来看
很多时候更像我的小孩一样
而我也尽量让你们感觉辩论的开心
你们也都告诉我一起辩论学到了很多
而且过程中也真的很快乐
但是决赛进不了了,对不起
而这些快乐,真的快乐了吗?

我从你们身上学到了很多
我也明白你们付出了许多努力
但这就是辩论,这就是比赛
别人表现得比你好时
就要承认自己不如人……

第一次对辩论有这种感情
我可以顶着沉重的睡意
继续找些资料提升大家
但是又感觉你们好像吸收不了这么多
而有时候欲言又止
这支辩论队不是在比赛
我们在享受,对吗?

赛后的对不起我心领了
和你们一起辩论,真的很开心
我们是在表演
表演着我们对辩论的热忱
表演着我们主张的概念

我强调你们必须学会独立
不是依赖着以前的学长
又或者是和别人寻求大量帮助
我根本没有找过任何人
我喜欢你们给我的意见
我喜欢你们给我的概念、思想

而这次的比赛……
虽然结果不是我们想要的
但是至少我们都努力过

伟圣
旗帜你拿着了,记得当好舵手
带领他们去做你们想要的
总有一天你们要学习独立,为什么不是现在?
静柔
一个聪明的辩论员
四人里面你的辩风和我最相似
必须展示你的自信
诗媛
你是里面让我最惊喜的辩论员
会私底下努力做好自己的部分
一定要辅佐好伟圣
还有凯欣
我看到你今天的失落
我一向来都很欣赏你的才智
但是这次无法把你表现好,对不起

你们都让我很感动
让我语重心长地和你们说了很多
而这就告别了我的中学辩论生涯……

明年吗?
可能因为这次的表现
明年批评声浪会大起
连机会都没有了吧……

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

after muet..after first match..

the first round of the MSSD debate juz past on the sunday before..
what a tension feeling watching my debater fighting there..
but i seems like do nothing except pattern liao liao..
yea~we win for the first round..and not a perfect match..
and the problem is the "road" we selected is wrong..
and the next match's opponent is KI..
a difficult match too..

muet's speaking test yesterday..
quite shit because i dun know what to say..
and dun know how i past my 2 minutes in task A..
luckily i think i do well in task B..
keep going well in the remaining test..PLS..

meeting later with my children..
the topic is quite difficult for me..
FIGHTING!

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

bina insan

one more opportunity for me and my friend in 7c..
we have to do a presentation during bina insan next month..
and juz like what i usually thinking..
i will try to make a difference between my class with others..
therefore i try my best to settle what i can do myself..
typing the story..downloading the video..
create the playlist..selecting the story-teller...(is it call a story-teller..?)
finally seven or eight of us had been selected..
me..lehying..syerchen..chiayee..yingkit..yeeshan..hanzhang..and one more..
he or she had not been discovered yet..haha..

our topic is regarding about
and what the main idea is about??
no drama..my first impression..
we have to do some presentation to BINA INSAN..
some meaningful advertisement..and little story..
and the "solid" step is still in the process..

what will it be???
what will it be???

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

about my 19's

i juz past my 19's birthday few days before..
what a wonderful memory and gathering among us..
thx to all wishes and may god bless all of us..
for the future of our life..and of course..for the coming STPM..

as i said..i had a wonderful birthday..
my lunar birthday falls on the same day..
what a coincidence!!!!haha
and thx to my baobei..for the noodles.. <3
the Dell's mouse..it is quite expensive i think..T^T
anyway..i need it and love it..

and my brother in bombastic..
we are quite save in daily life..
but upon my birthday..you all are very kind..XD
felt a little bit sorry seeing you all spent a lot of money that day..
and i love your gift very much..
22.9 for the dinner steamboat..10++ for the gift..
emmmmmmm..so sorry ar brother..
you have the chance to claim back the gift~haha..

for my lovely classmate chixin, syerchen and ruice..
the badminton bag is really awesome!!!
trying not to be so HIGH when i get that thing..
thx to chixin and muscleman..
searching the chance to show to you all..haha~
thx to ruice for the little cute spongebob..
and..im not spongebob anymore har~

and my former classmate in kk..
thx to the frame and the photo..
but im still finding a place to put it..
i dun have my own desk now~~
so..where i gonna put  this~haha~
in my heart? i think so..XD

thx to all wishes..and especially you..
the surprise was really surprising me..
the future birthday will be dumb without you..

"the one who loves you the most will be by your side at the end of this love story..we will become the one who is next to each other..i believe.."

Friday, February 3, 2012

understanding about..

performance and celebration for CNY in my school today..
why so late? =.= a few days more comes to the end of CNY..
i thought this celebration may use two or three periods..
so that i no need to bring some text book to school..
but i was disappointed with that..fully disappointed..

juz like what my beloved principal sister Koon said..
we have to use our time wisely in study..
so the sambutan become the program for bina insan this week..
and..this sambutan is really "ganjiong"
they surely gave our three show within 30 minutes..
and this 30 minutes included speech by sister Koon..
dragon dance, lion dance and people dance..haha..
although the dancing by the animal was not bad..
but sister Koon spoiled the feeling of my lovely CNY..
what a bad ending written by my principal sister Koon..

she dun want to use PnP time for this celebration..
my friend told me this is the reason..
because our celebration was firstly hold on the Wednesday..
so do sister Koon change it to Friday..

actually she did many things that i dun understand..
juz like normal human being..we dun understand it at all..
dasar from kerajaan about program mengkukuhkan BI and BM..
but it is fully useless that ask us to sing every morning..
i bet..not more than 5% is following this program..
the most disgusting thing is..asking teacher to sing it along..
ya..i know you all are juz following what your taukeh order..
but pls put us in the hot soup everyday listen to your sound..
this is really an agony..for my very start of everyday in school..

other..asking pre-u student wearing unit uniform to school every Wednesday..
Tuesday and Thursday is our koko time..we wearing track suit to school..
and!!!Wednesday we will wear unit uniform..
how about our formal school uniform!!!???
we will juz wearing it on Monday and Friday..  orz
and no track bottom is allow except SMKSI's track bottom..
well well well..i was fainted that time..
juz like forcing us to buy another track bottom..
wearing it for Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday..
and more and more meaningless thing she did in my school..
it is not enough if i use three days to talk about her..
she is actually testing me about understanding..
from the angle: STUPID..